This should be shared far and wide.

When you approach me in public, you are Schrödinger’s Rapist. You may or may not be a man who would commit rape. I won’t know for sure unless you start sexually assaulting me. I can’t see inside your head, and I don’t know your intentions. If you expect me to trust you—to accept you at face value as a nice sort of guy—you are not only failing to respect my reasonable caution, you are being cavalier about my personal safety.

Fortunately, you’re a good guy. We’ve already established that. Now that you’re aware that there’s a problem, you are going to go out of your way to fix it, and to make the women with whom you interact feel as safe as possible.

Read the whole thing.

I have listened to about six obituaries, and seen about two hundred Facebook postings. I have seen extraordinary YouTube videos; reminders of a great talent. I’ve heard “King of Pop” and “great talent” and “genius” and “savvy investments.” And I’ve seen maybe two or three oblique references to “controversy” or being “troubled” from individuals (not on the news). Even a feminist blog referred gently to “shortcomings.”

On So You Think You Can Dance last night, Nigel Lithgow celebrated Jackson as an artist; given the nature of the show, that’s appropriate, but then he said something about “a great life.” No. A great art, yes, but not a great life.

Can we please, and I know I’m interrupting the great national outpouring of grief, but can we please remember that this man was almost certainly a child molester? Of multiple children on multiple occasions? Can we please just notice that?

Can we remember: This man was tried for this crime, and afterwards the jurors said they really felt like he’d done it, but that the prosecution hadn’t proved their case and they had no choice but to acquit despite feeling he was guilty.

I get that people are complicated. I’m not a great believer in (you should pardon the expression) black or white. Everyone has good and bad within them. But how is it that in this barrage of information I am the first person I’ve heard mention this kind of important thing?

You want an answer? It’s because this culture has already decided it’s not important. If we just ignore child abuse and pretend it’s not there, minimize it when forced to confront it and put it back undercover as soon as possible, everything runs so much more smoothly. If we just forget the little part about the children suffering horrifically, everything is so much better. If we forget that part.

I don’t want to forget that part.

But hey, this isn’t exceptional. It’s not like we usually condemn child molesters but Michael was so special that in this one case we’re giving it a pass. This is the normal functioning of Western patriarchy. This is how it’s done.

I don’t know that I have a lot more to say about that. I don’t think I need to amass evidence, here, that we ignore child abuse wherever possible. I don’t think I need to point to the many newspaper articles, for example, about men in their forties “having sex with” twelve year old nieces or whatever. Not abusing, raping, attacking, assaulting, or molesting, mind you; “having sex.” That’s even prettier than “controversy.”

I’m not interested in prettying it up. I’m not here to make nice. An extraordinarily talented child molester died yesterday. Some people are not grieving the loss of talent. Let’s remember them, too.

Via Sociological Images I find this delightful Dell website for women computer shoppers.

Apparently women shopping for computers care about (1) style– whether or not it matches their outfits, (2) how light it is to carry around when they hang out with equally-coordinated friends and their laptops, and (3) the ability to check movie times, and restaurant directions whenever you need to.

It takes 3 clicks to even get to anything about the actual computers’ processor speed, RAM, hard drive capacity etc.

I am so offended.

You know what? I’d like computer accessories in different colors. I hate that my wheeled laptop case was only available in black. That I tote around a black laptop with a gray mouse in a square black case. Color is good. Style is good.

Why do I have to choose between INCREDIBLY DUMBED DOWN and ugly and utilitarian? Are geek men so fearful of feminization that color must be banned?

I can choose color and styling details on my car while still shopping for safety, reliability, horsepower, and gas mileage. I should be able to choose color and styling on my laptop without being made to sit in the girl corner.