Archive for July 14, 2009

Character trivia answers

All done. Good work.
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Tuesday Trivia: Characters

Here’s the character, name the movie.

1. Calvin is a mellow Native American smitten with the main character, though he knows little about her.
Solved by melissa.

2. Spence is pretending to have a Special Forces background, but is found out.
Solved by melissa.

3. Big Dan wears an eyepatch.
Solved by Evn.

4. Marie is too smart for her low-life boyfriend, and has eyes for Roy.
Solved by Melville.

5. Lambert is the fifth to die.
Solved by Hazel.

6. Polexia is a friend of Penny’s.
Solved by Christina.

7. Lydia is a bullfighter who was injured in the ring.
Solved by Christina.

Monday Movie Review: The Fountain

The Fountain (2006) 6/10
Tommy (Hugh Jackman) is a research scientist working on brain tumors, and hoping to find a breakthrough in time to save his beloved wife Izzi (Rachel Wiesz). Tomas (Jackman) is a Spanish conquistador seeking the Fountain of Youth on behalf of Queen Isabella (Weisz). Tom (Jackman) is a bald guy in a bubble with a tree. Directed by Darren Aronofsky.

I am so confused.

I am okay with non-linear plots. I adored Memento. I like mysticism. I love romance. But I found this movie very difficult. Visually stunning, kind of engrossing, but ultimately frustrating. I had a sort of a sense of what was going on, but I felt like I was spending too much time trying to figure out what was going on, and it was distracting me from enjoying the movie. My teenagers (my son and my goddaughter) enjoyed the movie a lot more than I did. Arthur in particular didn’t care whether he understood, because he found the palette of light and color, and the repeated motifs of stars and specific shapes, so fascinating. And certainly the movie is like a painting; unfortunately, too much Dali, not enough Monet.

Because The Fountain deals with a man facing the death of his beloved wife, and because it is abstract and laden with symbolism, it lends itself to comparison with What Dreams May Come. The latter movie is weird, otherworldly, and metaphorical, and yet I never had trouble following it.

After watching The Fountain, I started looking at some of the DVD extras, and they started talking about Tom on his spaceship in the future. And I was all like “SPACESHIP? It was a SPACESHIP?” No clue. I had no clue. Because shaved head, lotus position, talking to a tree in a bubble in the stars doesn’t read “spaceship” to me, it reads astral travel or nirvana or something like that. The kids, apparently, knew it was a spaceship, so maybe it was me, but seriously, the teensiest bit of exposition is all I ask.

So what I get is that these two very pretty people with very prominent eyebrows are deeply in love, and this love transcends time, except it doesn’t really, because the whole Spanish conquistador thing may be a novel that Izzi is writing, except maybe it isn’t. But she is dying and he is upset by that so there are intense facial expressions and some hot sex.

The ideal eyebrow

As I was tweezing this morning, I thought of the several occasions on which I was told I had “good eyebrows.” No, seriously. My arch is exactly where the arch is supposed to be.

And it suddenly hit me how stupid it all is. I mean, there’s a place where your arch is “supposed” to be? And if it’s not there, you’re irrevocably flawed? Now, I agree your arch should not be in your nose. If your arch is in your nose, tweeze that sucker.

The Ideal Eyebrow

The Ideal Eyebrow

I like grooming. Grooming is fun. Grooming is pleasurable primate behavior. That’s not the point. The point is, how many body parts have “ideal” states, and how come we have to work so hard to achieve that ideal and hate on how we have failed to achieve that ideal?

It is objectively insane to care about whether your eyebrows conform to an ideal. Or to think that there is something wrong with the eyebrows you have that makes you somehow Less Than.

I saw Julia Roberts on a talk show and they asked her about Mystic Pizza, and she said that was before she started doing her eyebrows, so it’s unbearable for her to look at it now. Julia Roberts. Hates on how flawed she was because of those giant hairy monsters devouring her face.

And this is the point at which I think we must all agree that we are OKAY with the body parts we have. Stop hating on the eyebrows. Or the breasts or the ass or the skin or the toes. Stop. The energy of self-hatred is exhausting. The time spent trying to fix imaginary flaws is extensive. Groom, enjoy the pretty, but calm the hell down.

New Jersey trivia: All solved!

I love New Jersey.
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Tuesday Trivia: New Jersey Natives

Dunno, I’m just into it today.

1. Montclair, Morristown: Has a sister named Pia and is all of 5’1″.
Solved by George.

2. Penns Grove: Actually born in Germany on a military base, is well known for his warm divorce; he attended his ex-wife’s wedding.
Solved by Evn.

3. South Orange, Maplewood: His first TV role was in an after school special in which he poses as a girl to get a summer job. Went from TV comedy to directing and starring in an independent film.
Solved by Melville.

4. New Brunswick: Son of a famous actor, husband of a Welsh actress.
Solved by Evn.

5. Newark, Irvington: Dad and brother were cops, real name Dana Owens.
Solved by Melville.

6. Edison: Born Susan Tomalin, eldest of nine children.
Solved by Hazel, Herb, and George in a freakish three-way tie.

7. Tenafly, Englewood: Graduated magna cum laude from Harvard, daughter of a well-known actor, Oscar winner.
Solved by Evn.

Two books in Russian!

Llewellyn just sent me a box of The Way of Four and The Way of Four Spellbook in Russian. (Of course, I don’t ever remember being paid for Russian rights, so now I have to straighten out the paperwork, but whatever.)

Naturally, this is very exciting. This is the fourth language in which I am in print. In addition to English, I’m printed in Polish, Indonesian, and now Russian. So cool.

If you are interested in purchasing either book in Russian, I have a few I can sell. I have no idea what the cover price is, but I’m sure we can figure a fair price. Please contact me if you’d like to buy either or both books.

Monday Movie Review Rerun: To Have and Have Not

I just got back from Kentucky and I haven’t got time to write a new review, so here’s a review I wrote over three years ago, for one of my favorite films:

To Have and Have Not (1944 ) 9/10
Fishing boat captain Harry Morgan (Humphrey Bogart) and pickpocket Marie (Lauren Bacall) are reluctantly involved in helping the French Resistance. Directed by Howard Hawks.

When people say “They don’t make ‘em like that anymore” they mean To Have and Have Not. » Read more..

Late solutions to Tuesday trivia

Sorry, I was out of town.
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Experience the 18th Century

Advertisement on the radio for Colonial Williamsburg Resort:

Experience the 18th century, without ever leaving the 21st.

Wait. That was optional?