Why are some people so clueless?

Particularly, clueless about Teh Gay. I’ve been meaning to blog about this for a while, but misty at Shakespeare’s Sister alerted me to this completely insane story.

I’ll give you the short version: Nine women are suing Clay Aiken’s record label for leading them to believe he was straight.

They allege that employees of RCA, Sony/BMG, and Aiken himself “engaged in collusion to prevent public disclosures they believed might be harmful to their product”.

The angry ladies go on to state, “This is tantamount to a manufacturer concealing information about a defective product. Therefore these actions were both unfair and deceptive to consumers.”

A spokeswoman for the group says, “As consumers, we feel ripped off. It is obvious now that the private Clay is very different from the manufactured packaged public Clay that was marketed to us.”

Okay, there’s just lots and lots that’s dumb about this, and frankly, my brain cells are popping like bubble wrap just trying to think it through.

First, the idea that pop stars are manufactured to have a different appearance than their private selves is, what, new? Wait’ll you see the lawsuit when they find out that Britney Spears wasn’t a virgin! The horror! The horror!

Second, is any vestige of privacy really the price paid for success? Do consumers really have the right to full disclosure about an artist’s personal life so that they know what they’re buying? I thought they were buying the work; you know, the songs and stuff. Doesn’t this lawsuit amount to saying they’re buying a person? Isn’t that, like, illegal?

But finally, I’m totally bugged by how surprised so many straight people are that some people turn out to be gay, and how much evidence they seem to need before they get it. I mean, surprised at stereotypically, flamboyantly, fabulously gay people being gay.

I could offer a zillion examples. Liberace. Liber-flippin’-ace! People didn’t know he was gay. People wondered if he’d get married. But hey, it was the fifties. So how about, say…Ricky Martin. People were shocked! Shocked I tell you! At rumors of his gayly gayness. Because otherwise he was…what?

Okay, how about Willow on Buffy the Vampire Slayer? Within a couple of episodes of Willow and Tara meeting, it was pretty clear that there was a romantic undercurrent. There was the tension of whether or not to introduce Tara to the Scoobies. There was Tara saying to Willow ‘I’m yours.’ Yet when the two finally kissed, the fans went nuts. here’s what Joss Whedon had to say:

Okay, let’s do this. For real: how @#$%&ing disappointed was I in the American public after Tuesday night? Of course I realize the rabidly homophobic posting contingent represents a smaller percentage of Americans than the EVIL GAYS they were posting about, but that’s not it. It’s the fact that everyone went nuts about it THIS WEEK, when this has clearly been going on for MONTHS? Did anyone see the spell scene in episode 16?

Here’s another one. Last week I watched Fried Green Tomatoes for the first time. I had heard people complain that a lesbian relationship in the novel was watered down for the film. In fact, I’ve seen people ask “Were they lesbians?”

DUH! The character of Idgie is only happy when her older brother teaches her to cross-dress at age eleven. She is crestfallen when she learns Ruth will marry, and refuses to attend (but spies on) the wedding. And people wonder if she was in love? Oh. Come. On! It was a love story fercrissakes!

In some ways, the cluelessness, the inability to simply be aware, is worse, is more hopeless, than the homophobia. (Okay, not really. This is hyperbole. Homophobia is worse.) Because it bespeaks a life lived, a worldview, in which homosexuality does not exist, and is a surprise each and every time. If you looked at the world with the knowledge that some people in the world are gay, just as a matter of course, you could not possibly be surprised by its most obvious instances. So just wake the hell up.

13 comments

  1. Sarah says:

    Word. Just… a big, fat Word.

    Remember when I first popped up here and delurked? I mentioned that I write. I happen to write homoerotica and my brain spends about 80 percent of its time immersed in a world where gay is more normal (or at least the normal focus) than straight. And then I go grocery shopping and get a rather rude awakening when some person in line ahead of me laughs and says, “God, he looks SO gay. Yuck.”

    No, I didn’t yell. I have class. I did kind of clear my throat, though, and say, “At least his clothes fit well and his belly isn’t hanging out over the top of his too tight low rise jeans.”

    I like to earn my bitch points. ahem.

  2. deblipp says:

    I sent a writing sample to an editor looking for erotica. Didn’t get the job. I thought it might be interesting work. 🙂

  3. Sarah says:

    Heee! It is, mostly. 😉 And then plot happens and the fun really starts. 😀

  4. Tom Hilton says:

    What you said. But to me the funniest thing about this is the implicit complaint that they never would have bought his sucky CD if they had known they didn’t really have a chance with him. 😉

  5. deblipp says:

    And now I’m thinking…false advertising? Did the album cover actually say “heterosexual”?

  6. Ken says:

    I’ve given up being amazed at the stupidity of the anti-gay mentality…. But I still have vestiges of outrage at how some lawsuits are allowed to be prosecuted……. This should have been thrown out of court the instant it was introduced!

  7. bgruagach says:

    I wonder — do these same fans launch lawsuits against the movie industry for keeping it a secret that male stars like Rock Hudson were really gay? Do they refuse to watch “Rebel Without a Cause” because James Dean wasn’t straight? Do they sue publishers who print the work of writers who use pennames?

  8. deblipp says:

    People are so weird about their suppressed homophobia. Like if I have a crush on, say, Patrick Stewart, someone will say “I heard he’s gay.” To which I can only say “Darn, there go my chances.” (And Stewart, btw, isn’t gay. Just sort of fab.)

    No one says “But he’s married” when I say I adore Antonio Banderas (and I do. And Melanie has nothing on me). Why should the gayness of someone I’ll never meet matter to people? Why does it change the fantasy?

  9. Roberta Lipp says:

    Okay, I’m going to grab at some kind of devil’s advocate type thing for one second.

    –It is very funny, btw, that you and I both blogged (well, I more ‘online journaled’, but whatever) yesterday, on the topic of the gays.–

    There is, often, a deliberate attempt to deceive. Rosie O’Donnell and her big ole Tom Cruise crush.

    Now that I think about it, it could just be one hilarious gay joke on the straights. BAHAHAHA They will fall for ANYTHING, those straights.

    I remember hearing second-hand about an article by or about a gay guy who basically said that if you strap a baby on your back, you can blatantly flirt with straight guys and they will NEVER get it.

    I am still frequently surprised to find that people are gay. Me, who showed the fag-hags how it’s done in one lifetime and lived with a woman in another. ME!!!

    So, although I share your outrage and dismay, I also cringe with self-recognition.

  10. deblipp says:

    Oh, gaydar does sometimes fail. No doubt. And then there’s the other thing, like seeing Brent Spiner marry a woman. I actually tried to get the store to take back my gaydar after that, it was obviously defective, but the guarantee is only 30 days.

    But it’s the continual refusal to notice that there are real live gay people everywhere, all the time, no matter what you think, that gets me. Also, these crazy women compared Aiken to a “defective product” that they wanted to return. Defective? That’s pretty offensive.

  11. gilda says:

    No matter what the world thinks, an artist can only depend on his fans..the people who love and support him, to support them and their wishes. It is my understanding that this artist has denied the claim and no proof has ever come forward. Much innuendo and rumor, but all really hearsay. It is despicable that people who called themselves FANS, have fallen off course and become the biggest, ugliest enemies he will ever know.
    Celebrity is no fun place to dwell in, with exception to the income. Why should it even matter anymore in this world if someone is gay? The disappointment in this case, stems from the disrespect this poor guy is getting from every angle. Questioning him relentlessly is pretty offensive to me. He seems to be a great draw of public attention, as his name pops up all over the place, and the bashing comes from all sides. All of this because of the choice of silence? How disgusting. His fans take him at his word. They seem get offended by others who bash him. The product he puts out sells and his personality is contagious. He isn’t disappointing anyone that invested interest in him as far as I can see.

  12. kit says:

    I’m a Claymate. Clay has stated on 14 separate public occasions that he is straight. He now, quite reasonably refuses to discuss his personal life further. The 8 gals who sent in the complaint (which never saw the light of day, by the way) were NOT former fans. They were current fans of a rival of Clay’s, and they only listed their first names (pseudonyms, of course) on the complaint. Clay has numerous Hater groups out to destroy him. We’re working on WHY!

  13. claymate says:

    I to am a claymate
    yes clay did say so many time he was not gay. there are a lot of haters out to get clay I would love to sit down with 2 haters and listen to see why they hate clay so much. Clay has a great voice and for most he helps out the children. clay loves kids he is not doing it because he is clay aiken he is doing for the love he has for all children. clay has help my grandchild!! and I am so greatful. If clay is gay I dont care because he helps the children and a lot of stars do to. if clay done northing at all but keep his fame to himself again people would talk about it to so I ask when is it time to leave clay alone?